Finders Keepers
by YukiHimeChaan
Summary: How hard could it be? Making a 'normal' cake that is. Not the whole parenting thing...  UlquixHime
1. For The Love Of Flapjacks!

**AU: **How hard could raising a baby be? Ulqui x Hime !

******I believe in nothing...  
**Not the end and not the start.  
I believe in nothing...  
Not the earth and not the stars.  
I believe in nothing...  
Not the day and not the dark.  
I believe in nothing...  
But the beating of our hearts.

* * *

**Finders Keepers, Chapter One: For The Love Of Flapjacks!**

" Ulqui-Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan~!" Orihime sang as she skidded down the stairs. Skimming her hands against the dandelion yellow walls, she jumped the last step and rounded the corner into the kitchen diner. She was greeted with the back of an onyx head. Dainty feet danced around his lithe form, and peered into green eyes brimming with confusion.

" Ehhh?" She exclaimied, " Whatcha doin' Ulquiorra?" He blinked, glancing towards her.

"What is this, Onna?" He questioned, pointing an accusing finger towards a small, rectangular, and currently singing, metal device. Orihime, looking dumbstruck, started to giggle quietly. His serious tone coupled with his childlike ignorance made her want to gather him into her arms and protect him from the world, while cowering at his feet. Such a strange feeling. Plucking the object out of his slim hands, she started to explain what exactly it was.

" Well you see, Ulquiorra, this is a communication device! It allows us to talk with people while they aren't there, or send them a written message. It's really great, see?" She flipped the top up, and showed the former Esapada the workings of a cell phone. " This here is a text message! People just type in the letters aaaand - Voila! Or you could call them, and then you can hear what they're saying, whatever floats your boat. " Accustomed to the girl's strange sayings, Ulquiorra nodded his head in understanding. He could aquire further information elsewhere.  
"How is the child?" He asked, laying a hesitant palm on her slightly rounded belly. Sighing at his touch, she leaned in closer and encircled his waist, resting her head on his chest and banishing any doubts he held. Returning the gesture he inhaled her scent of freshly baked bread and cinnamon rolls.

"The baby's missed it's daddy..." She murmered, sighing softly. Ulquiorra snorted in a rare moment of amusement, and lifted his head to gaze into her eyes.  
"It's has hardly been an hour, Onna. The baby has not had the chance to miss me, and even if it had, I very much doubt it would. " Orihime's face dropped at his comment. Where had his self confidence gone? Did he think the baby would not like him? Did he not like_ himself_ ? While she was thinking, her eyes shimmered with tears, alarming Ulquiorra greatly to her inner turmoil. Realising his mistake, he kissed her forehead and rubbed his hand in comforting motions on her back.  
"Do not worry Orihime. I just meant that the baby will not know me yet. All it knows is it's mother..."  
"We wont have to call him or her 'it' any longer after today Ulqui-chan ! We have our doctors appointment at 3 O'clock!" Noticing her change of mood, he thanked the God's for pregnancy. Cheering her up would be so much more difficult without it.

* * *

Utter boredom. A never ending hole of crap with nothing to do. Sinking deeper and deeper into the sofa, Tatsuki resisted the growing urge to call her pregnant freind. Sure, Orihime would cheer her up, but what sort of friend would she be if she rung her up at this hour just because she was bored_? Not a very good one. _Besides, she was probably planning the vacation with Ulquiorra, why would she feel the need to intterupt that? She was happy for the ditzy girl, and that wouldn't change, but she felt somehow that she was missing out on that kind of living. Yeah, she'd had fun, made friends, beat up a few people. But where was the _meaning_ to her life? Where was the commitment to another person, the trust that was almost always absent? Why didn't she have the life everyone else seemed to live? Orihime had Ulquiorra. Ichigo had Rukia. Hell, even _Uryuu _had that shinigami girl! What the hell was wrong with the world? She hadn't done anything not to deserve someone but...what was she thinking? She sounded so jealous and spiteful!_  
"Whats wrong with me?"  
_As soon as the words came out of her mouth, her phone started to beep. Who was texting her at this time of night?

_Taaaaaaaaaaaatsuki! Tatsuki, Tatsuki ,Tatsuki!  
It's twins! Me and Ulquiorra are having TWINS Tatsuki! Oh , It's so exciting! A girl and a boy too! Oh my golly golly GOSH I can't wait !  
And remember what we talked about yesterday? Ulqui-chan said yes! It's going to be great seeing everyone again! ( And Ulqui can get to know them as well :L) I'm going to start packing right now, how is everyone by the way?_

_Your best buddy,_

_Orihimeee xxx_

_PS! Ulquiorra says hi!  
__PPS! No, I did not. I would never use such a foolish welcome. The grammar is all wrong.  
__PPPS! Never mind him! He SO said hi!_

Tatsuki smiled fondly. Orihime was still Orihime it seemed. Reading over her text once more, she pressed the 'reply' button and began to type.

_Hey Orihime ! I'm so glad for you two, you honestly deserve it! Ichigo and rukia are still touring america, but they'll be back in time for the 'reunion'. Chad's in the semi- finals now, he's up against some guy called Jeagerjaques? Stupid western names. Oh, and Uryuu moved in with that girl (Nema? Noume?), but it's close to Karakura, so they wont be travelling far... have you still not told everyone about 'him'? Or the baby?  
I hope you realise Ichigo will murder him in his sleep._

_Tatsuki ._

_PS. Tell Ulquiorra to look up 'hi' in the dictionary, I'm sure it's in there._

Deciding her response would do, she placed the phone on the plush sofa and started towards the kitchen. With a simplistic design of beige walls and oak flooring, her kitchen was suited perfectly to her hectic lifestyle. After leaving college, Tatsuki had pursued her dream of running the Dojo and taken over from old man Daichi, leading the team all over the country, until finally, their ratings soared into the top ten. Smiling to herself at the thought, the karate champion searched the fridge for any food that had survived her two week absence. Her sharp brown eyes caught a glimpse of chocolate in the corner, and leaning closer, she discovered it was the chocolate cake Orihime had sent over for her a while back. _It looks safe enough..._

How wrong she was.

With watering eyes, she sprinted to the bathroom and promptly threw up.

* * *

Ichigo was suddenly overcome with a feeling of great pity. Call it a sixth sense, but he was sure someone had just been faced with the most vile, inhumane torture a human being could could undergo. Tatsuki? Chad? Uryuu? Or the that knew boyfriend of Inoue's Tatsuki had been telling him about? Who ever it was, the guilt settled as he came to the conclusion that he could not have prevented the mental scarring in their mind. After all, he couldn't possibly blow up Orihime's kitchen without hurting her feelings...

* * *

"What about this one?"

" I don't think 'horse radish' is a name, Orihime."

"Are you sure? It says it right here...oh! How about this? Pork! How cute! "

"Pork? Onna, if I remember correctly, that is related to pigs. "

" Nooo...that was 'steak' Ulquiorra. Honestley! FLAPJACK!"

"Excuse me?"

"As a name...?"

" What sort of book are you reading?"

"..."

* * *

**A/N: **HEY ! Thankyou thankyou thankyou for reading! Did you notice a sertain Espada's name somewhere... ? Review if you want the next one, I would LOVE some ways to improve this :)

Bye!

YukiHimeChaan xxx


	2. Sweet tooth

**A/N: **Just skip the story and you'll find it :)

**Prison gates wont open up for me,  
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin',  
Oh, I reach for you.**

**Well I'm terrified of the four walls,  
These iron bars can't hold my soul in,  
All I need, is you.**

_**Come please, I'm callin'...**_

**And oh, I scream for you.**

_**Hurry, I'm fallin', I'm fallin'...**_

**Show me what it's like-  
To be the last one standin'.  
And teach me wrong from right,  
And I'll show you what I can be.**

**Say it for me! Say it to me!  
And I'll leave this life behind me.  
**

_**Say it if it's worth savin' me...**_

* * *

**Finders Keepers, Chapter Two: Sweet Tooth.**

"Fummm...Fiii Fiii Fo Fuummm...Fummmm...Fum!" Orihime hummed cheerfully, scrubbing at the dishes with her favourite washcloth. It was floral, with pink polka dots adorning the rough material, giving it a very Orihime-ish feel. Needless to say, Ulquiorra had not approved of the colour, but she had insisted on buying it anyway, telling him that his chosen option was boring and plain and that white was not 'in-style'. Taking offense, he hadn't spoken to her for the rest of the day, and took to sulking in the corner whenever she tried to talk to him. She smiled affectionately at the memory, pausing at the sink, and turned around to look at said man. He was lounging on the sofa, hands resting behind his head. His emerald eyes were hidden away behind a frame of unruly ebony hair, and the porcelain expanse of his skin held a pale glow in the early morning light. The sudden urge to caress his cheek itched at her palms and quickly, she stuffed the offending limbs into her pockets. He was just _too_ cute when he slept.

"What are you staring at, Onna? " Ulquiorra said, his expression never wavering. Orihime squeeked in fright, snapping out of her thoughts.

"Wh-What? I...I wasn't...ummm..."

He raised an eyebrow. "Of course you weren't. " For a fleeting moment, Orihime could almost see a smirk grace his lips. She felt the heat rise to her face and began muttering about ' stupid emo's '. Her embarresment was short lived however as her stomach started to burn and bile rose to her throat, so clutching her mouth in a desperate attempt to conceal the rising tide of morning sickness, Orihime lept to the sink and began throwing up into a plastic tupper-ware box. Ulquiorra appeared at her side almost instentaniously, and gently held her long orange locks back. A hidden look of concern flashed across his green eyes, only to be replaced with a sorrowful kind of helplessness as he mentally degraded himself for his inability to protect her. Her head bobbed up after about five minutes of non-stop retching and she smiled at him in thanks. He nodded and proceeded to mop at her mouth with the discarded washcloth, taking care to avoid her raw lips.

"Are you okay?" He muttered against her mouth. Orihime in turn, grinned at him and laughed.

"I'm fine!" She cheered with fake enthusiasm. " Stronger than a horse, me! Stop being so mopey ! " She spun around on her heel and began to clean the mess in the sink. Ulquiorra, looking puzzled, approached her from behind with caution, seirously doubting her sanity.

"Orihime," He whispered. " Are you sure?"

"I'm fine." She mumbled. He took it as his que to shut up, and wrapped his arms around her little waist.

Orihime spoke up first. " Have you finished packing? We need to be at the airport for around three, so..."

"It is done."

"Oh, Okay."

The awkward silence continued.

"Are you excited? "

"Not particullary."

"Nervous?"

"No."

She furrowed her brow in annoyance. Brainstorming for another minute, an idea popped into her head as she pushed the urge to shout 'Eureka!' to the back of her mind. For now.

"Would you...would you like a cupcake?" She asked slyly. Noticing how his lean body stiffened against hers, she smirked at her success. Of course he wanted a cupcake. The image of him eating ice cream for the first time flickered in her head. _This should be fun..._

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

"Surrender now and I will spare you." The black haired man hissed with venom, glaring daggers at his opponent. His lips snarled with an animalistic rage as his enemy laughed gleefully and proceeded to hold the item out of his reach. She skipped backwards with uncharacteristic grace and swept a lock of ginger hair from her face.

"Really? But playing with you is so much fun, Ulqui-_chan!"_ She snickered.

He glared at her some more, his startling green eyes glinting in annoyance. "I would advise you not to refer to me in such an informal tone,_ Onna. _However,I'm not sure you'd understand the concept of manners."  
It was Orihime's turn to glare. "Are you calling me stupid?" She gritted out between clenched teeth. "Remember who's holding your precious cupcake." A flash of alarm ran through his pale face as she dangled the cake inches from her lips. His aggresive posture stiffened into one of predatorial instinct, his legs preparing to spring. Would she do it?_ I doubt it._ He subtly grinded his heels of his feet into the plush carpet and was about to pounce when she flicked her tounge out and tasted the pink icing in a teasing gesture.

"Mmmmm...yummy."

Ulquiorra snapped. He leaped at the girl and tackled her to the ground, stradling her hips with his thighs. Firmly, he pinned her arms above her head with one hand, and swiftly plucked the cake from her fingers with his other. The redhead narrowed her eyes and kicked him in the groin, catching the cupcake between her palms as he fell to the ground clutching his manhood. Ulquiorra groaned as the wound sent waves of agony tearing through his body, and clamped his eyes shut. He stayed like that for another minute, until the sensation died down to a dull throbbing. The espada hauled himself and broken ego towards a sitting position and -hissing in pain- looked around the room. The Onna/Cake were nowhere in sight, but he could still feel her prescence nearby. The sweet scent of cake could not be detected.

"She is _so_ not getting hers tonight."

* * *

"Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. . Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichi. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo. FOR FUCKS SAKE ICHIGO! WAKE THE FUCK UP!" Rukia screamed into his ear.

"Wh-Wha..."

Rukia smacked him upside the head.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?"

"For not waking up."

"I WAS ALREADY FUCKING AWAKE!"

"Your face annoys me."

"THATS NOT AN EXCUSE!"

"Where's my toothbrush?" Rukia enquired sweetly, quickly changing the subject. The redhead sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He glanced at the clock again.

"Rukia, do you know what time it is?" He hissed.

She looked at the clock and shrugged at him nochalantly.

"3:46. Can't you read? "

He sighed in defeat. "Why do you need your toothbrush at 3:46?"

"Because" She started, in a tone in which one would speak to a child, " It's not in my suitcase. We're leaving today. What am I supposed to brush my teeth with if I haven't got my toothbrush?"

"Have you looked in the bathroom?"

"..." Rukia spun around and stomped towards the hotel bathroom, opening the wooden door and slamming it shut. Her purple-tinted eyes scanned the sterile white room. The shower stood in the corner, shielded only by a flimsy blue shower curtain while the basic white sink was propped up against the wall, cluttered with various hair care/ shower products. Among these was her Chappy printed tootbrush. She snatched it up and switched the tap on.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

After she was gone, Ichigo sighed and buried his head among the covers. He wouldn't admit it, but behind his furrowed eyebrows and scowling mouth he was jumping up and down in joy. After two years of travelling around the USA, they were finally going back to Japan to see everyone - and the prospect was just so exciting to Ichigo. His friends and family meant the world to him and being seperated from them for so long had been killing him. Isshin, Yuzu, Karin. Tatsuki, Keigo, Mizuro. Chad and Uryuu. Orihime. His eyebrows knitted together at the last name. When Orihime had gone of to England to study, a little bit of him felt like it had been torn away. He hated himself for it, but he had wanted to send someone with her to reassure himself of her safety. The girl was just to trusting and naive! And he felt sorry for her, because he knew she could see the looks people gave her. The looks of doubt, and sympathy. The looks that told her she was weak. But after what happened in Hueco Mundo, everything had changed. Orihime had done something. She had proved people wrong. She had _erased_ the Hogyoku...

* * *

~The next day...~

* * *

"OMG OMG OMG! Ulquiorra! Have you got the tickets? Where are the tickets? ZOMG! What if we miss the flight and then the Mafia hold us hostage because the Cookie Monster is hungry, and they've turned him into a cannibal, so he wants to eat us, then Jack Black will play at our funerals, and we'll wake up and it'll all be a dream but the ninja butterflys ran out of yoghurt so-"

"Onna. I have the tickets" Ulquiorra interuppted, completely unfazed by her ranting.

"You do? Thank god!" She cheered, kissing him on the cheek and running of to find her suitcase. She found it in the kitchen and heaved it through into the hallway, dropping it by their feet.

"Phew!" She cried. "Are you ready?" Ulquiorra nodded and picked up both their suitcases with ease.

"Oh! Wait! Ulquiorra! Have you got your inhaler?" She shouted after him, worry twisted into her words.

He looked back.

"I'm not a fool, Onna," He said quitely.

She breathed out in relief.

"Good" She smiled warmly. "Lets get going then!"

* * *

**A/N: **All Done! :) Hope you enjoyed this chappy! :D We'll get some more characters into the story next chapter, maybe more IchiRuki fluff, not sure:) I'd love some opinions and ideas for next chapter, so reviews please! AND, some more info on Orihime's mysterious power...Till next time!

YukiHimeChan xxx


	3. An Orange Dilemma

**A/N: **If you want something to listen to while you read, I suggest Breathe Into Me by RED.

**And this is how it feels when I, ignore the words you spoke to me.  
And this is where I lose myself, when I keep running away from you.  
And this is who I am when, when I don't know myself anymore.  
****And this is what I choose when it's all left up to me.**

_**Breathe your life into me! I can feel you.  
I'm falling, falling faster!  
Breathe your life into me! I still need you.  
I'm falling, falling! Breathe into me!**_

* * *

**Finders Keepers, Chapter Three: An Orange Dilemna.**

_"Welcome, New Comrade." A sickening smile in the dark. Whispers echoing of white washed walls._

_"Tell me, what is your name?" Sterile white clothing. Glinting brown eyes. A sudden knowledge thrust upon a mind devoid of emotion. The lack of a heart._

_"Ulquiorra Schiffer."_

_Its black again. I'm floating._

_"Soten Kisshun! I reject!" A flash of long, orange hair. Defiant grey eyes. She stands._

_Nothingness yet again._

_"Tell me, would I see it if I tore open your chest? Would I see it if I cracked open your skull?" Confusion. It's clouding my judgement. I'm unable to stop._

_The sting of her slap lingers on my cheek. I long for her touch._

_I'm falling._

_"Are you afraid?"_

_A white hand stained with blood._

"Flight 078 now boarding. Calling all passengers."

Startled green eyes snapped open at the robotic voice. Sitting up too quickly and sliding of the chair, Ulquiorra's hand flew towards his heart as he gasped for air. Orihime looked round in worry.

"Ulquiorra? Ulquiorra! Are you okay? Is it the asthma? " She cried, crouching down in front of him.

He looked up at her, trying to calm her down. "I..am...I am fine..." He whispered hoarsly. "It...was... just...a bad dream.."

"Are you sure?" He nodded his head. She placed a hand on his forehead and wiped his damp hair from his eyes. He just seemed so..._fragile._

"It's because you don't eat enough!" She huffed. "Under that muscle your so _skinny!_" He quirked an eyebrow.

"Is that...so? Maybe I would eat more if...if you refrained from trying to poison me." He muttered, standing up and brushing himself off. He noticed the odd looks some of the passengers were sending him.

"I do not!" She yelled. Placing her hands on her hips, Orihime stood up. "I'd like to see you cook some-" Ulquiorra smirked and slid his hands round her. He captured her mouth mid-speech and used this to his advantage as he slipped his toungue past her sweet lips. She gasped and stiffened slightly, but after a second, returned the gesture with a heated passion. They stood like that for a few minutes, mouths battling for dominance, until Orihime pulled away. She panted a little and turned her face away, trying to hide the blush dusting it.

"Your so embarrasing..." She muttered. A ghost of a smile graced his lips.

"If you don't hurry up, we'll miss the flight."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

"Ulquiorra, why are we in first class?"

"Because I paid for first class, Onna."

"Well why did you do that?"

"Because I do not wish to be seated in the midst of trash."

"Ulquiorraaaa ! Thats mean!"

"No it isn't, Onna."

"Yes it is, MAN!"

"Do not call me that."

"Don't call me Onna then!"

"But that is what you are."

"And your a man. Well thats if last night was anything to go by..."

Ulquiorra glared at her.

"Do not bring such things up in public, Onna."

"You started it, man!"

"I did no such thing."

"You bought us first class tickets!"

"Your ungratefullness caused this."

"That isn't even a word!"

"...yes, it is."

"No it isn't!"

"..."

* * *

"Ichigo. I'm bored." Rukia stated.

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"Find me something to do."

Ichigo sighed for the thousandth time that day. The girl had been complaining all the way there, all through the airport waiting time, and now during the flight to! If she didn't shut up soon, he was going to go bankai on her. Rukia prodded him in the cheek.

"What?"

She pulled a sad face. "Im bored Ichigo! Can't you do something?"

"No, Rukia, I can't."

She let out an exhasperated breath. Ichigo was such a pain.

* * *

Ulquiorra had dozed of about an hour ago, and they were now half way throught their flight time. She had long since run out of snacks. So, Orihime being the idea master that she was, the redhead had taken to finding the most unusual hair colour aboard the plane possible. That being said, there wasn't much variation. All different shades of browns and blondes littered the space, but so far, her own colouring took the cake. Just as she was about to give up, a little head of pale green made itself known. It was about three rows infront of Orihime's seat, with the chair tilted away from her. As far as she could tell, the hair was styled in a childish bob, and this was further confirmed when the voice belonging to the head spoke.

"Starkk! I'm bored! Wake, Wake, Wakey up!"

_Starkk? What a strange name..._

"What is it Lillynette?" A lazy voice groaned. She knew that voice...

_"It seems I'm going to have to borrow her for a while" _Orihime clasped her hands over her mouth. It couldn't be!

"Ulquiorra!" She hissed. He murmed something inchorant and nestled his cheek against her shoulder.

"Ulquiorra!"

"What is it, Onna?" He muttered, his eyes still closed.

"Ulquiorra, is it...is it possible that you weren't the only Espada ressurected as a human? I mean... could others have to?" One eye cracked open to look at her in thought. It snapped shut.

"I suppose so," He stated. "If they had been somewhat compliant towards the terms of living again. It was required that you were to live among the humans as one of their own, but you had to give up your powers in order to do so. I highly doubt some would've done this. Why do you ask?" She took a deep breath.

"Because I think Coyote Starkk is sitting infront of us."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

"Okay, Ulquiorra," She whispered."Keep quiet until I tell you, okay? We'll sneak up from behind, then take a peek! If it is him, then hide and we can discuss phase two!"

He sighed. What had she got him into ?

"Operation Espada Peek is GO!" She yelled, causing a few passengers to look round. The redhead blushed and lowered her voice.

"C'mon, lets just go..." Her face was a red that would make even Renji envious as she dragged him through the isle. She kept her head low and curved her back, like it would somehow lessen her chances of being seen, and ducked down behind their targets chairs. Yanking him down, she began to whisper furiously into his ear.

"Right, I'll look over the chairs in a second, and as soon as I do, roll this orange underneath them, so they'll be distracted!"

"Onna, I highly doubt they will be distracted-"

"Yes, they will, Ulquiorra."

"No they-"

"Yes Ulquiorra,"She ground out."They will." He backed down quickly. Of course they would.

Her face lit up. "Okay, now thats settled, on the count of three...ONE! TWO! THREE!" She jumped up and quickly peered over the back of the seats, while Ulquiorra rolled the orange under the chairs. He rolled his eyes. There was no way this was going to work...

"Oh my GAWD! Starkk, an ORANGE!"

* * *

**A/N: **Ahhh I KNOW It's a short chapter this week, but it's the end of half term so I wanted to get this chappy out ASAP! A special thanks to all my reviewers...

**Selena Estella**

**DevilishBea-Anime-Couple-Lover**

**nypsy**

**Divine Rose**

**YourRedRightAnkle**

**Seproth**

**Seisakusha-sama**

**Thanks to all of you! You really made my day !**

All questions answered here...

Seproth: She'd be about 15/16 weeks pregnant by now! Its early enough so that they can find out the gender, yet because she was quite slim, she wont start showing properly until she's in her 20th week :) Obviously he was VERY gentle...*coughLIARcough* :)

Seisakusha-sama: I'm really liking that idea, and maybe it'll be happy and not-so happy? I love stirring things up! I'll organise a doctors appointment for them soon!PROMISE:)!

nypsy: You tottaly read my mind on one of those pairings, it's a secret as too which one yet though ;)

COOKIES FOR ANYONE WHO REVEIWS, BAKED BY GRIMMY THIS MORNING!

Grimm: Thats 'Almighty Grimmjow-Sama' to you.

Bye's :)

YukiHimeChaan xxx


	4. Home Sweet Home

**A/N: **Previously on Finders Keepers...(God, this feels like an episode of 24!)

_"Okay, now thats settled, on the count of three...ONE! TWO! THREE!" She jumped up and quickly peered over the back of the seats, while Ulquiorra rolled the orange under the chairs. He rolled his eyes. There was no way this was going to work..._

_"Oh my GAWD! Starkk, an ORANGE!"_

PS. Want something to listen to while your reading? I had 'Fix You' By Coldplay playing in the background while I was writing :)

* * *

**Finders Keepers, Chapter Four: Home Sweet Home.**

Rukia sighed happily as she wove her slender fingers into short orange locks, massaging the scalp underneath. The substitute-shinigami's head on her lap snuggled further into her soft lilac skirt and inhaled deeply while gripping the material in his hands as he slept. He muttered something inchohorant and drooled slightly. The raven haired girl grimaced as he did so. She swiftly pushed him off her lap, leaving the man with no means of support and toppling off the airplane seats. Eyes snapping open in surprise, Ichigo yelled out as his head struck the floor with a dull thud. She dusted off her skirt, disgust painted across her sharp features.

"Your so gross when your asleep, Ichigo." She proclaimed, smoothing down her short ebony hair. Ichigo's mouth gaped open for a moment, staring at her in disbelief. Glaring at him, Rukia frowned.

"Shut your mouth. You look like an overgrown fish. "

"Hey! Where the hell are all these insults coming from-"

"Didnt I tell you to shut up already?" Ichigo exhaled loudly, slowly counting to ten. By the time he'd reached five, Rukia was tying her hair into little pigtails and checking her watch absentmindedly. At eight, she'd booted up her DS and was vigourously shooting at little pixelated squares resembling chikens. Once he reached ten, he hauled himself from the rough floor and flopped onto his seat. Pulling his phone out from his jean pocket, he scanned the contents of his inbox. One new message.

_Ichigo & Rukia,_

_Can you text me back when you land? Orihime should be landing in anouther hour or so. If you don't reply soon, I'll make sure we drive off before you get here._

_Tatsuki._

His face dropped. She was still the same old Tatsuki alright. And soon he'd see her, and his family, and Chad and Uryuu and Orihime. He wondered how much they'd all changed, if Yuzu had finally confessed to the moody red-head at Urahara's shop. If Uryuu had ditched the white clothes, If Karin had opened up a bit more. If Orihime had found someone to appreciate her cooking, if Chad had stopped growing yet. He wanted to know it all, and be there among those he loved.

"Hey, Ichigo?" Rukia said softly, the DS abandoned . Ichigo turned to look at her, a smile drifting across his normally scowling face. Wrapping his strong arms around her, he whispered quitely into her ear.

"We're going home, Rukia."

* * *

Orihime ducked her head down and plopped on the ground with all the grace a sixteen week pregnant lady could muster, her eyes shimmering with excitement as she whispered quickly and quietly to her not-so-impressed partner.

"It's him, Ulquiorra, it's him! And-oh!" She cried, peering through the gap in the seats,"Nel-chan too!" Ulquiorra's face fell in disbelief._ Why didn't she just do that before?_

"Ulquiorra, was the other girl an Arrancar?" She questioned, her head still jammed between the seats.

"Move over." He commanded, gently pushing her to the side as he looked through the gap. Starkk was sitting in the middle, his loose beige shirt and brown pants crumpled from slouching in his chair. On his right was Neleil, sleeping soundly on his lap while to his left sat Lillynette, fussing over her newly found prize. She was dressed in a little pink tank top with a crudely drawn shark covering the majority of the material, while on the bottom it proclaimed her to be a 'maneater'. Matching shorts too. He scoffed at her choice of clothing. _How utterly innapropriate for a young girl of her age._

"Do you know her?" Orihime chimed.

He nodded his head curtly. "Yes," He began,"She's his other half."

"EH?" Orihime yelled, completely misunderstanding. Lillynette's head snapped round in alarm, while Starkk jumped and looked over the back of his chair. What he found there completely shocked him. The fourth Espada, Ulquiorra Schiffer, and their former captive Orihime Inoue, sitting on the carpeted floor of the aircraft directly behind him. A look of surprise flashed across his sharp features as he took the information in. Believe it or not, his brain was having a hard time processing it.

"Ulquiorra-?" The mans head slowly lifted to face the Primera, his jade green eyes slightly wider than usual, a hint of surprise refecting in their surface. Orihime too turned to look at the brunnette, her expression mimicking that of her partners, but quickly melting into a happy grin.

"Starkk-san!" She cried, standing up aruptly to greet him. Ulquiorra gracefully returned to a standing position, pretending that he had _not_ just been caught participating in a child's 'spy' game, but however, was betrayed by the ever-so-slight warmth in his cheeks. He coughed and went to shake Starkk's hand.

Starkk smiled awkwardly at him, gripping his pale hand in his tan one and shaking it firmly. "Long time no see, Ulquiorra. I see you've been very...productive these last few years..." He said, motioning towards Orihime. The girl looked bewildered, and furrowed her brows, a pout plastered across her lips.

"Is it really that obvious?" She mumbled, staring down at her tummy sadly. The Primera looked shocked as he caught on to what she was insinuating, swiveling his head to look at Ulquiorra as if needing comfirmation.

"Orihime-san, that's not what I meant. But...WOW. A baby, huh?" She nodded and smiled brightly.

"Two actually! Me and Ulquiorra are so excited! Ne, Ulquiorra?" The man looked at her with the absolute minimum enthusiasm a human could conjure, before he was promptly thwaked in the head by the flying blue blob currently known as Nel. Pitching over, he tried ( And failed) to grab hold of the nearest chair, but with the added wait pushing on it's edge, it spun quickly; dumping Ulquiorra on the ground. Sitting up quickly, he attempted to pry the childs stubby fingers from atop his head. Apparently Nel was stronger than she looked. She gripped clumps of his black hair in her hands, screaming and wailing as he managed to rip her away from him.

"No! Let go! " She cried, banging her tiny fists against his arm. He looked at her in distatse, holding her as far away as possible, as if she were an utterly revolting pair of old shoes. She narrowed her big, moss-green eyes. With a speed impossible for a normal human child her age, she twisted her head and clamped her mouth round his wrist, biting him profousely. In response, he yelled out in surprise as she continued gnawing his pale skin. Today was definately not his day.

"Starkk, would you mind removing this pest from my arm?" He gritted out, glaring at the older man. Starkk looked at him as if he had asked him to dress up as a nurse and spank him repetedly.

"And get Cero-ed to oblivion? No thank you."

Ulquiorra glared further.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

The monotonous voice of the captain spoke through the microphone. "Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seat belts. We will be begininng our descent towards Tokyo shortly."

Orihime squeeled in delight. They were going to be home soon! She glanced towards a sullen looking Ulquiorra, his eyes brooding and mouth set in a thin line. Placed firmly on his head was the former arrancar Nel, snuggling into his soft, messy locks. It was safe to say that he was not a happy bunny right now. The image of a dancing Ulquiorra complete with ears and a fluffy little tail popped up in her head, and she began laughing hysterically. Ulquiorra looked at her, and glanced away. It was nothing out of the ordinary after all. Little tears gathered at the corner of her eyes, her mouth now making no sound at all, save the occasional squeek escaping past her lips. After another five minutes of laughter, she managed to calm herself enough to fasten her seatbelt and giggle quitely to herself as she pursued her daydream. He rolled his eyes and clipped together the lock on his own seatbelt. The woman was such a strange entity.

"Ulquiorra?" Lillynette said, her head propped up on her arms as she spoke to him from across the seats. His eyes flickered up to look at her.

"Hm?"

"You and Orihime-chan are having a baby, right?" She enquired. His face clouded over in confusion. Was it not obvious?

"Yes. That is correct. Why do you ask?" His voice was suspicious.

Her eyes widened slightly.

"Do you love her?" Green eyes glanced towards the orange haired girl sitting next to him, her mind occupied as she conjured up impossible scenarios. Her soft grey eyes twinkled in the dim lighting, a little laugh released from her lips. He didn't even hesitate.

"Yes," He said quitely."I do."

XOXOXOXOXXOXOXO

**A/N**:Finally! It's finished! I'm SO sorry I haven't updated sooner, I've had tons of homework and have been totally occupied. But here it is! Just a little warning for next week...Something called plot will be added! Isn't that absolutely AMAY-DIDDLY-DAZING?

A little dictionary for those of you unfamiliar with japanese terms...:)

'Ne?' - Kind of like, 'Right?'/ looking for confirmation.

'San' - A polite way of addressing someone, normally used for people you know but are not very close to.

'Chan' - Normally when your talking to a child, however, it can be used when your putting someone in a cute light.

Most of you will probably know these, but i thought i should make sure :) Cookies are going to...

_**YourRedRightAnkle,**_

_**nypsy,**_

_**Anne the Fire,**_

_**Reflected Moon,**_

_**Seproth,**_

_**OneWhoNeverStopsCrying.**_

Thank you all for reviewing, your cookies are in the post :L 47 hits in March! Does that mean views? Imma bit cluless right naaw:( And, can anyone tell me how to view the peoples who have favourited? I would love to give them a big thank you next chapter!

Till next time!

YukiHimeChaan xxxx

PS! Can you see the little blue button-chan down there? Do you know what happens if you click it? Why don't you try it out ? :L


	5. Mini Punch With Icing On Top

**A/N: Just read on :) ...~! I was listning to 'Heartburn' by the Architects while I wrote this. ~**

**Burn everything you have,  
****And leave it all behind,  
****Lose all your inhebitions.  
****I took the mess you made,  
****And made you beautiful.**

_**Oh if time,**_

_**Only stood,**_

_**Still forever.**_

**Hold out your hand,  
****And lean upon it;  
****I'll be the one to make you smile.  
****Hold out your hand,  
****And lean upon it;  
****I'll be the one to make you smile again.**

**Chapter 5-Mini Punch With Icing On Top.**

Orihime twisted her head round back and fourth, searching for her best friend among the crowd. Her orange hair was twisted into a messy bun atop her head, little aurban curls unraveling themselves from the clips securing them; her cream knee-length skirt swishing in the wind. Besides her, stood Ulquiorra, hands in pockets, his alabaster skin looking even more so in the darkness of the night- as the only illumination provided was the comercially lit signs of the airport behind them. His viridian eyes glinted in annoyance at the lack of Arisawa's prescence. Was she not supposed to meet with them outside, and take them to her residence for the night? From what he had gathered, this was her and the Onna's plan, but it seemed that the former karate champion had not shown up on time for either one of two different reasons. The first reason, was that she had been held up in previous arangements, or was otherwise occupied for the time being. The other, he concluded, was that this woman was a very inpunctual or lazy person, not much unlike the Onna herself. A yell from across the crowded pavement caught his attention. "Orihime!" The woman at his side snapped her neck towards the sound, her soft grey eyes betraying the excitement bubbling within her. Catching a glipse of choppy, boyish hair, she squeeled in delight and ran towards the general direction of it. "Tatsuki-chan!" She shouted, tackling a girl much the same height as her into the most painful looking bear-hug Ulquiorra had ever witnessed. The girl in her arms laughed and hugged her back. They stayed like that for another minute, grinning and telling each other how much they'd missed the other. Tatsuki was the first to pull back, hauling herself and the happy red head into standing positions, holding Orihime at an armslength and examining her.

"Dear Kami," She started, " You haven't changed at all, Orihime!" She girl grinned as Tatsuki ruffled her hair, her eyes clouded over with a kind of childish joy.

"Likewise!" Orihime said. For some strange reason, Ulquiorra was beggining to feel very uneasy. Green eyes stared at the tomboy opposite the Onna, a hint of recognition hidden there. She wore white baggy shorts, with black and cream converse on her feet, and a beige cami top, revealing her all too athletic figure. Her hair was spiked up, in what he assumed was its natural styling, and not a hint of make up graced her sharp, angular face. And then -suddenly- it hit him.

_"Ugh," Yammi said, disgust lacing his words. " These souls taste disgusting." Ulquiorra snorted at the huge man. What did he expect? With such low reiatsu in the area of Karakura, the souls he consumed with Gonzui were bound to be foul. A low groan was heard from across the park. Scanning his eyes across the dead bodies littering the grass, he spotted a teenage girl struggling to her feet. Yammi noticed this, and turned to look at her, a grunt escaping his lips. "Is this the one, Ulquiorra?" He snarled. His ignorance was almost plausable to laugh at. That is, of course, if Ulquiorra was one to laugh. _

_"Yammi, you are a fool. Can you not see that she is female? That her hair is black, and not orange? You are nearly able to be considered trash, like her." The tenth glared at him. _

_"So I can kill her?"_

_"I believe so." _

_The girl had managed to stand, alebit slightly stooped as she did so. Her spiky hair was slick with sweat, and her brown eyes looked upon him with fear. Fear and hate. Two emotions he would never feel. Yammi surged towards her, his shoulders squared and a cocky grin plastered on his ridiculously large head. Again, Ulquiorra would have laughed. The confidence he displayed in front of her was unnessecary, her soul had already started to deteriorate in their presence. Was the man that idiotic? His hand swooped down, and would have surely killed her, had a large teengager not blocked it with his forearm. Such strength, Ulquiorra mused, to have been able to par that attack. Behind the Mexican was another adolescent, her aurban hair flying as she conjured a shield to envelop the figure on the ground..._

His eyes snapped open as Arisawa approached him, her fist clenched in an aggresive manner. The Onna stood a couple of steps away, her face contorted in worry. Raising her fist, she smacked the side of Ulquiorra's face, and_ hard._ He grasped at it, and glared. Apparently, he no longer held any authority over this woman. How annoying.

"That," She hissed. " Is for kidnapping Orihime." She stuck her hand out. "And this," She said as he hesitently grabbed it, "Is for bringing her back. Truce?" He looked at her, searching for any signs of deceit. Satisfied her intentions where good, he nodded slowly. She grinned and turned towards Orihime.

"We better get going then, huh?" Orihime's eyes widened in surprise.

"B-but... aren't we supposed to be meeting Kurosaki-kun and Rukia-chan here? "

"Meh. They can call that Urahara guy or something, I am _not_ going to wait another two hours in that stinking airport!" The brunnette grabbed her hand and dragged her across the street towards a small black car. Ulquiorra walked after them, his movements graceful and confident, because _no_ he had not just gotten hit by a female. And _no_, it didn't hurt. Arisawa unlocked the doors to the car and jumped in, revving up the engine immediately. Orihime followed her into the passenger seat, clicking the door behind her, while the male of the group slid into the back seat, all thoughts of self pity banished from his mind as the cold leather chilled his back.

"Shay, Ulkriora?" Orihime mumbled, her mouth full of some strange substance he assumed was food. At least, he hoped it was food. Where on earth had she gotten that from? The girl carried on speaking, regardless of the mushy stuff flying from her pink lips.

"Dooyouwannapleyagamesh?"[Do you wanna play a game?] Ulquiorra's back stiffened, and he shuddered, remembering a similar quote from a horror film Orihime had forced him to watch with her. That night he had sat up awake, paranoid that some creep wearing a mask would jump through the window. He had a feeling tonight would be the same, thanks to her oh-so-pleasant reminder.

"Not particulary. What would this game consist of?"

"Ummm..." Tatsuki decided to cut in here."I know! How about Mini Punch?" The redhead clapped her hands in joy. Of course! Why didn't she think of that?

" Thatsh a grayt ideya Tatshuki!" [That's a great idea Tatsuki!] She cried, her face stretched into what Ulquiorra was sure an almost impossibly huge grin, her eyes twinkling, and food flying all over the dashboard. How delightful.

"I believe," He started, " I did not consent to playing this game of yours."

"We don't need your consent..!" The driver yelled, ignoring the stares of fellow road travellers.

"What if I refuse?"

"What if you are a chicken?"

"I don't like what your insinuating."

"Prove me wrong then, dickhead!" Again, she blatently ignored the staring, shaking her fist out the window while Orihime watched on in worry. Ulquiorra was silent for a few seconds, contemplating on his next move until...

"How do I play?" As soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted ever saying them. Orihime spurted the chewed-up, unknown substance all over windscreen and promptly began choking on the stuff after inhaling too quickly, while their ever courtious chaufferess slammed the brakes down in the middle of the motorway, whipping her head round to face the him. It was safe to say he'd caused quite a disturbance.

"How do you _play?_ Your telling me you've never played Mini-Fucking-Punch?"

"...No." This time she spun her accusing gaze on the still partialy choking passenger.

"You never taught him how to play it?"

"U-ummm...M-maybe not..." She said, her words breaking up as she attempted to rid her throat of the disturbance, while still trying to sound dignified and unafraid in the face of Tatsuki's wrath. Her brown eyes narrowed dangerously, then cleared up immediately. She punched her fist out the window once more and cheered with all the sickly sweetness of a highschool cheerleader: "All right! Lets get playing then!" Ulquiorra sighed. This would certainly not be the comfortable, relaxing trip he had anticipated...

"ARE YOU EVEN LISTNING TO ME?"

"Yes, ma'am."

...

"Mini punch." He muttered for the seventeenth time in the last five minutes. This time, it was a ridiculously over decorated blue and yellow car, with garish and almost sickening depictions of a human mating ritiual plastered over the roof. However, it was not the worst he had seen as of yet. Didn't even make the top three.

"MINI PUNCH!" Orihime yelled, pointing repeatedly at a vibrant pink vehicle speeding along at what must have been double the speed limit. She laughed, and smiled, happy she had spotted one on the barren road. The brunette girl next to her glanced outside the window, searching desperately for another. Road, tree, road, tree, road, tree, tree, tree, car, road...wait! Car! Straining her eyes, she recognised the squared roof and small interior and opened her mouth to speak-

"Mini punch." Ulquiorra said, his voice rather lackluster as he pointed towards the very same one she'd just spotted.

"DAMN YOU! " She shreiked, smacking him round the head with her discarded flipflop. He was _so_ going to die.

...

**Okay. So I lied. No plot this chapter. [Insert sad and remorseful face here.]  
Hope you liked this chapter anyway, and I'm very sorry I was a bit late updating, but I've had to decide on my GCSE options this last week :/ aaah well, I've finished now and have the easter holidays to enjoy! I'll get writing immediately !**

**Thanks to all the reviewers, you really make my day! You get whatever I falsely promised last chappie! ;**

**OneWhoNeverStopsCrying,**

**YourRedRightAnkle,**

**nypsy,**

**Seproth,**

**frawg360,**

**airi-07,**

**princessofd,**

**sama-chan.**

**Now, button-chan is sad today, so give him a click! If you do, your transported to a magical wonderland where Ulqui-chan is alive and forever shirtless. Oh no, wait, thats just my imagination. Don't pretend you didn't wanna see the sexy man shirtless all day! 3**

**YukiHimeChaan is OUT! x**

**PS! This is a day for celebrating! I actually managed to reach 2,000 words this chapter! :0 x**


	6. The Mayhem That Is 'Breakfast'

**A/N: **Hello there! And here we are, chapter six of Finders Keepers...ah screw it. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

**Down,**  
**Here comes the sound,**  
**Everyone pound your feet to this Phenomenon.**  
** Now let's make it loud,**  
**Let's show 'em all how,**  
**You move to this Phenomenon.**  
**Roll!**  
** Open your soul,**  
**Maybe lose control,**  
**Inside of this Phenomenon.**  
**Just let your self go,**  
**And let everyone know;**  
**You move to this phenomenon.**

**Finders Keepers, Chapter Six: The Mayhem That Is 'Breakfast'.**  
**  
**

Ulquiorra awoke to the smell of burnt egg and overcooked onions. It was an overly-familiar and hugely despised scent, which informed his sleep addled brain two things. One; it was a Tuesday. And two? The Onna was cooking her (self titled) 'Super-Dooper-Orihime-Style-Onion-Omlettes-With- Pistachio-And-Spaggetti!'. Holding his breath, he rolled himself off the bed, clattering to the floor in what he assumed to be the most appropriate way of waking up. It only succeeded in presenting him with the beginnings of what he was sure to be a _delightful_ headache. He groaned, and dragged himself up, staggering towards the door like a drunkard. Once he reached it, he pushed it open, only to be smacked in the face by a bombardment of ridiculously foul smelling toxic fumes known simply as Orihime Inoue's cooking. The air left him, and the poison began wrapping itself round his throat, crawling steadily up his neck, over his chin, past his mouth and into his nose- he slammed the door shut. With gracefull, swift movements, he sunk to the floor, instantly welcoming its cool surface. The situation was worse than he had previously anticipated. Actually, that was an understatement. This situation no longer, in any shape or form, resembled the situation he had previously anticipated and was now potentially fatal for any persons involved. A quiet, almost inaudible sigh escaped his lips. How on earth was he supposed to make it down the stairs without choking? His sharp eyes searched the room in a vain attempt at finding something which would assist him in his mission.

In the corner was a half slept in bed, one side completely unrumpled and clean, while the opposite seemed to have an uncanny semblance to a scrunched up, sneezed in and generally disgusting piece of tissue paper; this being because Tatsuki had insisted that her and the Onna's parting required a sleepover in her room the minute they arrived from the airport. Standing next to it was a small, simple bedside table, it's surface almost unblemished apart from a plain bedside lamp and equally plain book on physics. The rest of the wooden floor space consisted of a smart beige bookcase against the furthest wall (bookcase being a massively misleading term, as inside was stacked with DVD's and DIY manuals), a small, dusty looking television, and their suitcases. Ah, no gasmasks at hand then?

Quickly, he picked himself up and moved towards the opposite wall, his socked feet sliding ever so slightly on the shiny wood. Upon reaching it, he grabbed the rough folds of cloth concealing the window and drew them apart, allowing the harsh morning light to flood the room. He lifted his hand to sheild his eyes, using the other to flip the brass handle near the bottom of the glass, the cold metal burning his skin for a second. He paused, but carried on after the chill receded. Pushing the window outwards, he took the chance to judge the distance towards the ground. Tatsuki's apartment was the second from bottom, and all in all, he predicted that the drop towards the grass below was no more than than nine or ten meters. He could risk that. Raising his knee until it almost reached his chest, he cautiously placed his foot on the rim of the windowsill. Gripping his hand onto the edge of the window now, he hoisted his weight up and twisted his body in order to dangle from the ledge. He took an intake of breath, hesitating only momentarily. He let go.

The feeling of flying, however short, was absolutely marvellous. The crisp air whipped around him in a technicoloured haze, gliding over his skin and leaving it red and raw, ruffling his inky hair and tearing at his clothes. Leaves from the mossy ground flew up to meet him in a chilling embrace as his body continued to plummet towards the earth. Blinking rapidly, he tensed his muscles in preparation for the impact he would surely make. Would he brake his legs, he wondered. Would he be smashed upon the hard paving like an egg on the floor? He grunted. Surely not? Even after the last few years, his body could not, _would_ not be that impracticed as to break a bone. And so, with newly found confidence in his ability to land, he drew his legs against his chest and splayed his hands. He only had to wait a second. Upon connecting with the ground, he bent his knees and quickly pushed up again, flipping backwards and landing gracefully on his feet. He almost smirked. Had he seriously doubted his strength?

From across the street, a tiny gasp startled him from his moment of self glory. Snapping his eyes towards the sound, he saw a petite girl, around the age of sixteen, gaping at him in utter disbelief. Her pale brown hair was cropped just below her ears, with the fringe secured tightly in a pink clip, and her blue dress whipped around her knees. Her eyes were wide as she began to stutter, a pale blush quickly spreading across her face.

"Wh-what..." She muttered, wringing her hands as she stared at him nervously, her bottom lip quivering. He intensified his gaze, daring her to say something. She gasped again, and quickly bowed her head, turning to run.

"Gomenasai! I didn't see anything...!" She cried, her voice becoming fainter as she sprinted away. He stood there a moment, and then swivelled his heel, walking briskly down the street and towards the nearest convenience store. Within minutes, he rounded the corner and pushed open a heavy glass door, the tinkling sound of a bell assaulting his ears as he walked through. At the counter was a woeful looking teenage girl, her dark hair parted strangely between her eyes as she wrote something down in a notepad, and beside her was a skinny redhead with his index finger stuck up his nose. He walked up to the desk, pointedly ignoring the redheads staring eyes.

"Whaddaya want?" The boy grunted, hand still protruding from his left nostril. The girl next to him shot up, and promptly began glaring at him.

"Jinta!" She reprimanded, her blue eyes portraying the utmost annoyance.

"What?"

"You can't talk to a customer like that!"

"Well...I just did."

Honestly, Ulquiorra mused, how hard could it be to act politely? What kind of man had employed these children? Nonetheless, he decided to get on with it, if only in order to leave the place as quickly as possible.

"Do you sell some form of air filtering?" The teenagers blinked, and turned to face him.

"Sorry...?" The dark-haired girl questioned. Jinta continued to stare, finger securely jammed in his nose. He was beginning to suspect it was permanently lodged there, though by what freak accident he wasn't sure.

"Is it possible for me to purchase a device which would filter any air inhaled?"

"Wha..."

"In other words," he growled," Do you sell something even remotely similar to a gas mask?"

"Oh!" The girl cried, clicking her fingers in understanding. For some strange reason, he seemed to imagine a glowing light bulb hovering over her head.

"Why didn't you say so? Let me just go check...!" She hopped off the chair, and disappeared into a back room behind the counter. That just left him and this obnoxious boy, then. Jinta glared at him. Ulquiorra could not fathom why, but he also decided to glare back, something akin to curiosity stirring within him as the teenager rudely began twisting his middle finger. And so they stood like that for five minutes, eyes narrowed and little non-existent sparks clashing in mid air.

_Twist._

_Wiggle._

_Glare._

_Twist._

_Wiggle._

_Glare._

_Twist-_

Ulquiorra snapped first. His hand shot up from the confines of his pocket, grasping at the offending limb and firmly yanking it down, bringing an array of mucus and flecks of blood onto the glass counter. The boy cried out, using his other hand to quickly cover his nose, rivulets of blood seeping through and dripping onto the floor. It seemed he had extracted the hand so hard it had begun to bleed. This time, Ulquiorra did smirk. His victory was short-lived, however, as the girl from before suddenly appeared from the back door, her small hands clutching at a moderately sized blue box. She smiled at him, and plopped it on the counter.

"One gas mask for Customer-San!" She cheered, seemingly proud of herself for performing such a meaningless job correctly. How pathetic. He nodded, and handed her a few bills.

"Come again!" Ignoring her, he walked out of the store, catching only a glimpse of their next conversation.

"Was he wearing pajamas...?"

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Ulquiorra arrived back at the apartment complex in just under two minutes, a feat he was not surprised at. As he approached the back pathway, he lifted his head to look at the open window on the second floor, quickly summarising that it was his own. He looked back at the box tucked under his arm, and then back at the window. Then at the box. Back at the window. He hadn't thought of this. Oh well, no matter.

Dropping the package in his arms, he knelt down to get a better look at it. Where was the- ah, there it was. His slim fingers tugged at the join of cardboard, only to find it was sealed with a fine line of sellotape. Furrowing his eyebrows, he allowed his hands to slide over the smooth plastic in a poor attempt to find the end point. He couldn't feel anything. Why was such a measly product wrapped so tightly...? Running his fingers over the box once more, he gave up, and brought the cardboard as close to his eyes as possible, desperately searching for that small, ragged line amongst the infuriatingly blank, shiny surface. It had to be there! He just had to keep looking...

Almost half an hour later, he growled and threw it roughly against the floor, stepping back and outstretching his hand, his emerald eyes ablaze with fury. He pointed his finger.

"Cero." He hissed, as a small, blinding green line of light enclosed the box in flames.

* * *

**A/N: **Ta~Da! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! A big thank you to for all the reviews and favourites, I think I cried when I read them :') Anyway, next chapter, I'm thinking of introducing Ichigo again... too soon? Please give me your ideas! And how come no one told me how sucky my spelling has been? I never noticed until re-reading it! So, a BETA position is open for anyone who wants it! (This also means you get to read the latest chapters quicker...)

Anyway, a shout out to all my fabulous Reviewers;

**nypsy,**

**sama-chan,**

**Seproth.**

Thanks guys! I'm glad to know you all enjoy this:) Oh and remember...the faster you review, the faster I update! I'm watching you through your computer (OR MOBILE!) screens!

Cheers! ~YukiHimechaan xxx

(PS! Lets try and reach the 30 mark this week...!;D)


	7. Prepare To Lose Your Dinner!

**A/N: **Hey all! Sorry I took so long updating, but I was sitting at home, throwing up and eating chicken soup (generally feeling sorry for myself) and decided I'd publish today. Hope you enjoy!

**Finders Keepers, Chapter Seven - Take A Sip Of Vodka.**  
By the time Ulquiorra had calmed down and managed to climb back up to the guest room, the smell from before seemed to have dissipated out of the window. Only a vague whiff of burning lingered in the apartment. However, this only seemed to fuel his bad mood further; so much so that he was driven to the point of slamming the door behind him as he walked down the hallway and towards the kitchen. He paused a second, listening to the conversation taking place on the other side of the wall. Now, Ulquiorra was not normally one to eavesdrop, but today he was feeling particularly spiteful, probably due to the chimpanzee clashing a pair of symbols together inside his head. And so, he listened.

"-and then I could've sworn he turned green! He looked all queasy, _especially_ after we went on the Pepsi Max-"  
Ulquiorra felt his body go cold. It seemed Orihime had been telling their hostess about the time they'd visited Blackpool; a visit he had not enjoyed in the slightest. The Onna had insisted they go on _every single ride_ available that day, a plan the former Espada could not comprehend. Why on earth would a human such as her be so willing to put her life in the hands of a rickety contraption designed decades ago, and consider it _fun? _He vividly remembered her explanation, and the torture that was soon to follow...

_"But Ulquiorra!" She whined, "Don't you think it like looks fun?" He stared at her, searching for the hint of fear that most definitely should have been there; but all he saw in her dove grey eyes was excitement. He sighed. Saying no was impossible..._  
_  
_  
_"It looks... dangerous." And indeed it did. The chipping red and blue wood looked uneven and splintered, while the drop itself (which had been advertised by the cheerful sales clerk as 205 feet high) tilted at such an angle one would have assumed the run down cart would simply fly off the edge, splattering it's occupants on the ground in a colourful array of cameras, scarves, and soupy red blood. Apparently, according to the ever knowledgeable mind of Orihime, this was impossible. He did not believe her._  
_  
_  
_"No it isn't!" The redhead cried, throwing her arms into the air in exasperation. He raised an eyebrow. Orihime looked crestfallen for a moment, before snapping her fingers and striking a ridiculous pose. Grinning, she pulled him over towards a map stand, plucking one from the row of neatly folded paper, and opening it up to reveal differently coloured squiggles interlinking and weaving around each other. In his opinion, a child could've done a better job._  
_  
_  
_"Look here!" She demanded, pointing vigourously towards a paragraph full of reviews for the ride she was currently trying to force him on. He leaned closer, ready to digest complaints about severed limbs and decapitated family members. The real feedback, however, suprised him._  
_  
_  
'After visiting Blackpool for four years, I finally went on this roller coaster, being far too scared to even consider it before. The last day I was at the Pleasure Beach the usual queue for the Pepsi Max was much, much smaller than usual - so somehow I was convinced to try it. The slow ride up to the slope builds the suspense and I was absolutely terrified - the view when you get to the top is really beautiful though. Then we went down! I found it fine and yes, it was definately worth the wait. You can be lucky for this ride - i.e queue length, sometimes it won't be open due to weather. I know I'll definately be back again this August when I go to Blackpool!'

'This ride is still fantastic even though there are now many rides competing for its crown. The first drop is amazing, the height is truly awesome, and the crawl up to the top of the 200 ft+ drop fills you with suspense of what is to come! Just to say- DO IT! Its great, its fantastic, and its British.'

'This is the very first roller coaster I've been on, and I cannot describe how intimidating it looks as you approach it and see that first drop of 200 and something feet. Got there and thought, what am I doing? Hardly any time to que for the ride, and as my hands were shaking and gripping the bar it started. Going up that first hill for the first time, and the POV of just how high it climbs, I thought my heart would stop. Signs tell you when you reach 50 feet, 100, 150, 200 feet and I can remember thinking this is it, I wonder what a roller coaster is like. The first drop is amazing...you're pushed back into the seat, feel like your stomach is up in your throat and it takes, quite literally, your breath away. The only part of your body you can feel is your feet, tumbling to the ground - it does make you feel very slightly sick- and before you realise you're lifted back up for another drop (not as crazy). At this point I was shouting praises. Went on it straight after, but sat at the back... Here, the first drop is faster and you cannot see when it is coming, so for an extra thrill head to the back. Went on it again at the very front... You can see all as you slowly pass the top climb and begin to descend slowly until suddenly... whoosh! Excellent. I went on it four times in total. Don't let the sight put you off, it looks very scary but the first drop is over in seconds, then you can enjoy the speed. Also, the views from the top are amazing, you can see for miles! You will want to ride this again and again!'

_Ulquiorra closed his eyes and counted to ten. It seemed the odds where against him this time. An 'excellent' ride, huh?_  
_  
_  
_"So?" She yelled in his ear, gripping onto his T-shirt and peering over his shoulder at the pamphlet in his hands. He turned his head, eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. Was she _trying_ to deafen him?_  
_  
_  
_"Will you ride it with me? Please? Pretty please?" He continued looking at her pouting - and dare he say it - cute face. Orihime frowned._  
_  
_  
_"Pretty please with Blueberry Pie on top?" He didn't reply, instead glancing away to observe the ride in all its creaking glory. Shrieks of joy (or terror, he wasn't sure) radiated from the monstrosity in irregular waves as the tourists risked life and limb in the name of excitement. How pathetically human._  
_  
_  
_"-Pretty please with giant marshmallow cookies and apricot slices on top-"_  
_  
_  
_"Woman." He growled, holding a hand in front of her mouth. "Cease your babbling. I will go on."_  
_  
_  
_"REALLY?" She cried, bouncing up and down, much to his displeasure. He glared at staring onlookers, forcing them to avert their gazes from her jiggling chest. Grabbing his hand once more, she lead him over to a fairly short queue. The duo didn't have to wait long until they were next in line. And soon enough, they were boarding the cart(Ulquiorra rather gingerly, Orihime nearly skipping on board). A greasy looking attendant strapped them in, his hands lingering much to long to be necessary around Orihime's bust. Ulquiorra sent a withering glare in the direction of his pimpled face. He backed off._  
_  
_  
_With a jolt, the cart sprung into life, inching along the ramp with a daunting slowness that could make a grown man wet himself. He growled, pale hands clamped firmly around the cold metal of the lap bar in anticipation. He was not scared. He could do this. Closing his green eyes, he breathed in, making sure to treasure every bit of stale air that entered his lungs like it was his last, because quite frankly, that scenario was almost unavoidable. A giggle from beside him awoke him from his moment of (fear? despair?)... self-preservation. Ulquiorra glanced up, staring in horror at the girl. She was still enjoying this? This monstrous, twisted, _grotesque_ idealism of fun? Her behaviour was simply appalling._  
_  
_  
_"Onna, you are not scared?"_  
_  
_  
_"Of course I am! Roller coasters are supposed to be scary!" She shouted, her voice muffled slightly by the howling wind and clicking of the cart. His eyes widened. Then why...?_  
_She grinned manically. "Sometimes, even scary things can be fun-" He felt his stomach drop past his feet as they noticed the sudden stillness around them. Turning their heads in unison, Ulquiorra only had a split second to notice their current position. At the height of the ride, they were tilted slightly forward, almost hanging of the edge. His eyes flickered downwards, and his breath hitched in his throat and-_  
_  
_  
"TATSUKI!" An obnoxious voice from the apartment door yelled. A very loud, familiar obnoxious voice. He pushed his way into the kitchen, only to be met with a huge explosion from the far wall. Covering his eyes, he waited a few seconds until the flying debris cleared, and dropped his arm to survey the damage. Bits of plaster and rubbish littered the floor, and he saw the girls in the corner, Tatsuki's eyes alive with rage as she clenched her shaking fists. Slowly, he raised his eyes to stare at the figure in the doorway. His hair was a shocking shade of orange, his mouth pulled down into a permanent frown. Ulquiorra could just make out a huge sword strapped to his back, behind the inky black robes swirling around his body.

Kurosaki Ichigo.

* * *

So yeah. Notice the complete lack of spelling mistakes? I'd like to thank my amazingly awesome BETA **sama-chan** for that! :)

**A shout out to all my reviewers...**

_**Seproth,**_

_**Cittyno2,**_

_**sama-chan,**_

_**OneWhoNeverStopsCrying,**_

_**Animerules3579.**_

I LOVE YOU LONG TIME! ;) Anyway, a few of you had questions about a game I mentioned previously. There's a description and link to a picture on my profile if you're still confused! So in this chapter we see Ichigo again! I'm sorry to all you Ichi fans, but I have a really bad habit of making him the bad guy. I'm sorry, hit me if you want!

If you have any ideas/questions you'd like to share, or would just like to tell me how much you love Bleach, feel free to tell me in your reviews! Remember, the quicker you reveiw, the more I write! Bye!


	8. Reunion of Blood

**A/N: Hello, hello! Ah This took a while, but here it is! After the past week of voting for Paul Gbegbaje on Britains Got Talent, almost wetting myself laughing at Michael McIntyre and squeeling over Bleachs new 'Unmasked' fanbook, (Ulquiorra is on the cover! His past as a Vasto Lorde is included! XD) I finally decided to get my butt in gear and type this chapter up. I hope y'all enjoy it! Remember to drop a review! :3**

**Seeing as my HUGE thanks to all my reviewers will probably ruin the mood of this chapter, I'll do it here!;**

**nypsy,  
Morning Bleach,  
Bleached-Whale,  
Cittyno2,  
sama-chan,  
Seprtoth.**

**And of course, a huge shout out to my Beta, **sama-chan**! I LOVE YOU LONG TIME! :')**

_**DISCLAIMER: **_(Okay, okay, I admit it. Disclaimers are never at the top of my to-do list, but I decided for the sake of the story I should include one.) **I do not own Bleach! It belongs to Tite Kubo, and this story is for entertainment purposes only!**

_**'Finders Keepers'-Chapter Eight;**_

_**Reunion of Blood.**_

"TATSUKI!"

In an epic explosion of dust and plaster, a huge hole was blown through the kitchen wall of Tatsuki's apartment. Looking back on it, Ulquiorra would've dryly commented that the explosion was most definitely caused by Kurosaki Ichigo's overwhelming stupidity rather than his spiritual pressure, as the door was just two meters away. Orihime, ever the optimist, would argue that it was the suddenness and dramatic nature of the situation that had prompted the Shinigami to smash the hole through Tatsuki's wall (whom of which would probably be too busy to add her opinion, what with the 'beating Ichigo into oblivion' and all). However, this was neither the time nor the place.

The man stood in the new found entrance, his eyes narrowed and mouth set in a thin line as he advanced upon the fuming karate champion; ranting as he went.  
"Why the hell didn't you wait for us? We were stuck in that damn airport for _three hours _looking for you, and then I had to deal with Rukia shouting 'unattended bag!' every 10 seconds, and _then_we had to catch a ride with Urahara, and you know whenever you ask that guy any favours he makes you pay him back in the most ridiculous ways and-" Ichigo faltered as he took notice of the rooms other occupants.

His eyes first registered Orihime, partially hiding behind Tatsuki, mouth agape in shock as she stared at him. They lit up in joy, and a smile began to creep across his face as he took a step towards her. But he paused again, sensing another familiar reiatsu. Turning his head, he saw Ulquiorra standing there amongst the rubble and smoke, his pale face betraying nothing.

The two stood like that for what seemed like forever, anticipating the other's next move. Then Ichigo growled, and in a moment of heart stopping dread, Orihime caught a glimpse of his eyes. No longer were they the warm amber of the past; they were a midnight black, surrounded by a ghastly shade of yellow. This wasn't Ichigo...

_"Long time no see, Cifer..." _The redhead gasped, hands flying to her mouth as she heard the voice of her long time friend. His usually soft tones were empty and muffled, and it was almost as if his speech was doubled. The underlying sense of madness echoing there scared her to no end. She shivered and drew closer to Tatsuki, seeking comfort in her furious friend.

"What the fuck, Ichigo? Are you fucking serious? I'm going to beat the fucking shit out of you, you ginger haired twat!" The woman next to her cried, shaking her off. Tatsuki strode towards whom she thought was Ichigo Kurosaki. Unfortunately for her, she was wrong.

"No! Tatsuki-chan! That isn't-" But it was too late. Ichigo's hollow turned around, fully facing them now. His face was a mask of deathly white, his eyes cruel and mocking as he advanced upon the brunette, moving forward with slow, meaningful steps. Each step echoed around the small kitchen, like water dropping into a fast flowing waterfall; seemingly unremarkable, yet demanding the attention of the curious onlooker with each drop.

Within seconds he had reached the slim woman, towering over her by a good two feet. Tatsuki glared back up at him, pushing her curiosity to the side and instead swinging her fist at him. The moment seemed to go in slow motion, Tatsuki's hand clenched and inching its way towards the Hollow, who was still grinning fiercely at her. Orihime saw his hand twitch, and before she could scream out to her friend, he had smacked her heavily into the wall. She stayed lodged in the crevice made from her impact momentarily, before falling limply towards the floor, her left arm twisted at an odd angle and a trail of blood leaking from her hairline.

Orihime froze, her eyes wide. Her hands began to tremble, her mind not completely registering what was happening. She felt as if time had frozen. _This wasn't...this can't be happening. This...this..._  
_  
_A chill went down her spine. The hollow was walking towards Ulquiorra, its fists clenched and mouth stretched into an eerie grin.

Switching her gaze towards the green-eyed man, she saw his chest rising and falling rather too quickly. His face was pale and clammy, eyes narrowed as he fought to keep his concentration. Something inside her chest throbbed painfully at the sight. He was _fighting_for her. Fighting himself. Ichigo lurched towards him, partially invisible as he flash stepped behind Ulquiorra, drawing his hand back as if to grab his throat. Ulquiorra, realising his situation, ducked down quickly and rolled towards the table, snatching a chair and snapping one of the legs off, wielding it like a sword. She noticed his strong, stiff posture, and allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief. He knew what he was doing.

Taking her eyes of the fight for a second, she looked for some kind of weapon amongst the mess of a kitchen. Behind her was the breakfast bar, almost unrecognisable under all the dust and debris, and chunks of polished marble lying around it. Ulquiorra and Ichigo were fighting near the kitchen door, away from the sink and table next to it. In the corner of her eye, she spotted a glint of metal. Whisking round, she glanced around the room, searching for what would possibly be of use to her. Nothing but rubble and planks of wood. She let out a frustrated sigh. She had to help Ulquiorra! But she couldn't fend Ichigo off with her bare hands...

And then she saw it again, a sheen of light reflecting off what was most probably steel, in the corner of the room. Quickly, she realised what she had previously believed to be a small chunk of wood was actually a handle, leading into the blade of a chopping knife. She swallowed, the cruel looking instrument striking fear in her.  
_  
__Come on Orihime, you can do this..._  
_  
_Slowly, she crawled towards the mound it was buried in and grasped the handle with both hands. With a swift pull, she tried to extract it, and failed miserably. Her eyebrows drew together and she tried again. It didn't move an inch. She felt frustrated tears well up in her eyes and wiped them away, smearing grime and dust across her face. Again, she pulled and tugged at the knife, heaving her body upwards in the hope that her weight would shift the stone heap. And again, it didn't move. The tears stung at her eyes now, and she allowed a hopeless whimper to escape her lips. Planting her feet against a section of marble, she grabbed the handle once more and propelled her body backwards with all her strength. For a moment it seemed as if it wouldn't budge, but then a horrible cracking noise issued from it and the wood came away in her hands, leaving the metal behind. She stumbled backwards and fell to the floor, landing heavily on her behind.

A loud crash from behind made her jump, and she spun around, her storm gray eyes wide at the scene before her. The two stood a few metres away, Ichigo grasping a very pale Ulquiorra by the throat. The wall behind him was cracked and splashed with red and the table to the right was mangled beyond recognition. Ulquiorra's hands clawed at Ichigo's, scratching them bloody and raw but Ichigo did not seem bothered, and instead dug his nails into the soft flesh, a trickle of blood sliding from underneath them. She felt bile rising up to her mouth, and fought desperately to keep it down as Ulquiorra's green eyes fluttered closed. His bloody lips remained open and she heard a short, strangled breath escape them. And that was when she broke.

"No...!"

Snatching up a battered looking saucepan, she ran towards the pair and swung the pan at Ichigo's head with all her might. It struck with a sickening crack and his neck snapped to the side, his yellow eyes wide for a fraction of a second. Huffing, she let go and it clattered to the floor. The red head glanced up, her cheeks red and tear stained, and eyes narrowed with hate at the man. Ichigo's reiatsu swirled around him, angry and dangerous, as he clutched his swollen cheek and stared her down. She was forced backwards by the pressure, and before she had even realised it, he had punched her, a deep, burning pain blossomed in her stomach, quickly spreading upwards and outwards like a flower. Her body was momentarily airborne, and then she felt something cold slap her back, something cracked and a familiar dark began creeping across her vision. A voice that sounded like Rukia's screamed hysterically in the background. and she could've sworn she saw Urahara's hat floating about in the mist.

Amongst all the bright lights and frantic voices, the last thing she saw was a limp, blood spattered Ulquiorra staring blankly at her. The darkness quickly took over.


	9. For You

**Chapter Nine of 'Finders ****Keepers'**

The first feeling to return to his body was one of unbelievable heaviness. It hovered above him like an ocean over his head, crushing and squeezing his lungs, almost to the point were he could hear the air leaving them. His chest burned from lack of oxygen, a flame licking at the pitiful organ that remained silent and cold. Around him was a nothingness that was neither _black_ nor_ dark_, but rather in shadow - void of life. Yet he felt as if shapes shrouded in the darkness lurked just beyond his perception; mocking him with their eerie, echoing voices that didn't exist, but at the same time were so real he could smell their foul, death scented breath rolling of their tongues.

Was this how he was to spend his afterlife? Alone in a world defined only by pain and nothingness? He supposed so. After all, he had lived a rotten life as a hollow, and his life in the world of the living was probably not that much better. Really, he shouldn't be so surprised. This... this was what he deserved. To 'rot in hell' as the humans put it.

He should really stop that. Referring to them as 'humans', that is. He was a 'human' also.

Why had he done that? Become one of them. The notion in itself was preposterous, and in any normal circumstances he would have much preferred to fade away with his pride intact. So why? Why lower himself to the likes of the Shinigami boy?

An image of a grinning, red-headed woman with a rounded belly flashed across his brain. Ah, the Onna.

The Onna, with her big heart and forgiving eyes. The one whom he had torured and kept prisnor all those years ago in Hueco Mundo. The one who was carrying his children. He did not deserve her; not after what he had put her through. But even so, she had welcomed him into her life, and in the process, redeemed him of his sins.

At the thought of her, something began to happen. The heavy air seemed to lighten, and something in his chest began to stir.

_Ba-dump._

He jumped, startled at the unfamiliar feeling.

_Ba-dump. Ba-dump._

Cringing inwardly, he squeezed his eyes shut as the painful throbbing overtook his being.

_Ba-dump. Ba-dump.  
__Ba-dump. Ba-dump._

The first one of his senses to return was sound. It began to leak into his ears, quiet at first, but soon taking on harsher, louder qualities. A male's voice shouting in the background. Soft, muffled sobbing somewhere close. The buzzing and whirring of a mechanical machine.

Come to think of it... was he even breathing? It certainly didn't feel like it. His lungs still ached and craved the luxury of fresh air. What was going on?

Amongst the darkness, he saw a light. From which direction it came from, he wasn't sure; but the light was always a good sign, right? A small smile stretched his lips. Maybe she would be there? Whenever he imagined her, she was always bathed in a soft glow, her fiery red hair creating a lovely contrast against the plain colour. Of course. She had to be there. So he should go too...?

Outstretching his arm, he began to walk towards it - with only the slightest hesitation marring his calm, calculated steps.

* * *

"Clear!" Dr. Uryuu Ishida yelled, slamming the defibrillator into the pale man's chest. His back arched, and he fell limply onto the stretcher.

"We're losing him!" One of the nurses cried, pointing frantically towards the monitor. His heart rate was decreasing rapidly with every second, the high pitched machine growing quieter and quieter, almost to the point where it was silent for a minute at a time.

"Shit...!" He muttered, wiping the sweat of his brow. He glanced towards the hallway for the umpteenth time. Orihime was standing against the wall, her eyes shadowed and shoulders trembling as the small brunette secretary tried desperately to usher the injured woman into the waiting room. Looking back at the man on the stretcher, he allowed himself to study him. His alabaster skin looked clammy and sickly, the dark blood splashed across it making it look even more so. The usually vibrant, sharp eyes that had ridiculed him many a time were dark and unfocused behind half lidded eyelids, and his whole body held a strange stillness about it, quite the opposite to its graceful, dangerous predecessor.  
Furrowing his eyebrows together, he loosened up his hands and gripped the defillibrator once more, positioning it just above his heart.

"Ready?" Uryuu asked, his voice sounding much more confident than he was. Only one of them nodded in affirmation.

"Clear!" No response came from the man. The fiery haired woman outside began yelling and screaming his name, banging her fists on the glass as the secretary gripped her arms, shouting for help.

"Clear!" He repeated the action again. The monitor started to issue a flat, high-pitched note as soon as his body crashed onto the stretcher.

"Damn it, Ulquiorra!" He roared, smacking the metal charges into his chest once more. And again. And one more time. Each time they connected with his chest, his body shook and flew up into the air, only to plummet back into the hard bedding beneath him. A feminine hand tentatively tapped his shoulder. He spun around, and came face to face with a nurse who's name he couldn't quite place, her eyes downcast as she mumbled.

"I think you should stop, Doctor Ishida... he's gone..." His eyes narrowed and the room grew silent, save for Orihime's hysterical screaming outside and the flat-lining monitor.

"Are you trying to tell me how to do my job?" He growled. Her brown eyes grew wide and scared, and she clutched a fist to her chest.

"N-no I..." She began to stutter,"I...I just..."

Uryuu was about to reply when a little blip on the machine caught his attention. The rooms occupants jumped and looked round in shock, and even Orihime went silent as she stared desperately at the machine. Another upwards movement broke the perfectly straight line, and then down it went. After another moment, it did it again, and then it began to create a rhythm, indicating Ulquiorra's steady heartbeat.

The door at the other side of the room flew open and Orihime sprinted through, shaking off the frantic woman at her side. She ran towards Ulquiorra's bed, holding her bloody stomach tightly with one arm. Pushing past the crowd of doctors, she knelt down beside him and clutched his hand, violent sobs shaking her body as she stared down at his pale face. He left her to cry for a minute before deciding it was time to intervine.

"Orihime..." Uryuu mumbled softly, crouching down to her level and awkwardly patting her shoulder. "I think you should go get treated. Ulquiorra will be fine."

She glanced up at him with red, watery eyes. "But h-he looks so broken. Are you s-sure?" She whispered, her voice thick from the tears.

"Yes. I think you should be more worried about yourself." He smiled at her, and offered her his hand. She took one last look at Ulquiorra and grasped it, gratitude evident in her eyes.

"Okay..." She muttered, limping out of the room much slower than when she had come in. Once she had left, Uryuu made sure Ulquiorra would be fine, and then finally turned his attention to the shadowy figure in the corner.

"Explain." Uryuu growled.

The figure stepped forward and revealed himself, the white and green striped hat atop his head as battered and dusty as ever.

"Of course, Doctor Ishida." He said with a knowing smile.

* * *

**A/N:** Hello everyone! OK, so some people have been expressing concerns over the last chapter/asking questions. I'll answer them here for everyone to see!

**"I like this fanfic but hate the fact that u mad him so wear and realli? asthma? i also hate how ichigo just lost it like that. he normally wouldnt and rukia is soo annoying!"**

**otherwise, i luv it! lol cant wait to see ichigo reaction when they told him orihime's was pregger and he punched her! luv u!" **_(luversblues)_

**-**Okay so, yes, he is a human. Obviously he will not be anywhere near as powerful as he used to be, but he gave that up for Orihime. And the Asthma thing is actually pretty logical. Remember where his hollow hole was! Also, the rest of the revived Espada (whom of which will be introduced VERY soon) will have problems in accordance with the positioning of theirs. Please remember that Ichigo's mind was not his own when he attacked, it was his hollows. The reasoning behind his actions and sudden hollowfication will be explained next chapter! And I love you too, little reviewer! :')

**"Since the fic isn't labeled tragedy, i'm gonna assume this is gonna be fixed next chap, otherwise i'm out. hollow or not, violence against a preggers character isn't my cup of tea (or kids)." **_(nypsy)_

-That was clever, noticing the genre like that. I thought I had you all fooled! And I'm sorry about the violence, but you may also notice that this is labeled 'Romance & **Drama'** I have to mix things up a little, I hope you understand. As you have probably gathered, Orihime seems fine, but all of this had to happen for the storyline to continue in the way I had intended, and this will all be very significant in the future! Also, this story is rated 'T'. I did that for a reason! I hope you will continue reading, as I promise that very soon this story will be going back to it's usual cheerful self! thank you for your review! :)

**"I don't buy it. I think its a dream or something no way your gonna have your otherwise cheery and upbeat story take such a shocking swerve. ****Still it is interesting to see what had happened. I did not expect Ichigo to actually kill everyone when he showed up. That was not on my things I was expecting to happen list. Well regardless ****An interesting way to handle things... well we'll see what happens next chapter" **_(Seproth)_

-Hmmm...this story** is** rated Drama, kukuku...:D

Anyway, thanks to all of you who reviewed! You all make me smile with your kindness!;  
**Seproth,  
nypsy,  
sama-chan**(a big shout out to you, BETA-buddy!:D)  
**Bleached-Whale,  
Morning Bleach,  
luversblues,  
Cittyno2.**

Please review! I may cry if we get to 50 on this chapter! :')

Till next time,

YukiHimeChaan xxx


	10. Surprise Surprise!

_Chapter10 of Finders Keepers._  
_  
_  
_Three days later._

_Karakura Hospita_l, Orihime mused absent mindedly, _is pretty big._  
_  
_  
The redhead stood amongst a maze of winding corridors and emergency rooms, the sterile white walls making her head hurt. She clutched a cold soda can in her left hand, the little drops of condensation dotting it's surface making it wet and slippery. Mind clouded over with thought, she swapped hands and wiped the water onto her skirt. Honestly, where_ were_the maps? She had only come out to grab a drink and was already lost! If she was in charge of a place this big, her first priority would have been maps... that is, after re-decorating, of course.

Maybe she should consult Uryuu about it later? Oh! And while she was on the subject, perhaps she should give him a few tips on how to brighten the place up, because, in all honesty, just looking at all the white made her want to retch. White walls, white floors, white clothes...hell, even the secretary's long, manicured nails were white!

An image of the bored looking secretary with white dragon wings in the shape of long, pointed fingernails floated into her head. Her fake-tanned, almost orange skin began peeling off in large sheets, whereas her thick, black lashes(coated with what must have been an entire tube of mascara) seemed to flutter away and join her wings. The skin beneath was a ghastly shade of grey, and she had to admit she had much preferred the tangerine look. Propped up against her ear was a phone which provided a steady stream of unintelligible chatter-it soon became a huge sword- and then Orihime realised _she_had a sword too! Now she could complete her mission of slaying the wicked dragon of Hueco Mundo, and saving the entire universe from it's clutches!

Weapon in hand, she advanced towards the evil creature, her footsteps soft and barely within the boundaries of human hearing. However, the dragon had much keener ears and picked up on the sound immediately, swivelling to face the brave heroine. Orihime's grey eyes burned with the utmost hatred and contempt possible as she lunged forward, determined to lop off this monsters head and-

"Oof!" She cried, falling backwards onto her bottom. Glancing up, she saw a very worried looking Uryuu. Complete in his doctors uniform, he seemed so much more grown up than the last time she had seen him. The white material(as was his preference towards all clothes) hung loosely on his lanky frame, and his glasses were perched on his nose, occasionally concealing the dark rims underneath his eyes as the light caught them. His hair, however, still maintained it usual glossy neatness despite the fact that he had so obviously been rushing somewhere just moments ago. Eyes widening, he shouted out in delight.

"Orihime!" He cried. "Where on _earth _have you been?" Reaching down, he helped her up and she smiled at him.

"Uhhhmm...getting a drink?" She muttered sheepishly, gesturing towards the can in her hand. He nodded once, and smiled back at her.

"God it's been so long-how are you?" He asked.

"I'm great!" Orihime chirped, but then lowered her gaze."But, I am sorry we had to meet again under these circumstances..."

Uryuu looked at her sadly, and hesitantly enveloped her in a hug. She sniffled a bit, then pulled back, holding him at an arms length. Her eyebrows furrowed.

"Tatsuki never told me you became a doctor!" She gasped, the information just reaching her head. Uryuu shifted awkwardly and fiddled with the hem of his sleeve.  
"Yeah well...I had wanted it to be a surprise... " He mumbled, a bit of pink coloring his cheeks as he fidgeted nervously. Orihime frowned. Since when had he been so shy? Had he really changed that much? She vaguely remembered a text Tatsuki had sent her not so long ago: '_Oh, and Uryuu moved in with that girl (Nema? Noume?), but it's close to Karakura, so they wont be travelling far... '_  
_  
_  
Orihime gasped and hugged him again.

"Well done!"She cheered. He looked bewildered, so she grinned happily and explained herself.

"You and Nemu-san! I'm so happy for you two!" Uryuu's face turned another three shades darker once she released him. He tilted away from her and a far off look glazed over his dark eyes. A slight smile overcame his lips. Her grin became even wider as she witnessed his obvious love for this woman.

"I'm very happy...for you too, Orihime." He said, looking at her seriously. Orihime blinked owlishly, and then stared at him hard, not quite getting what he meant. After a few moments the cogs inside her head slid into place with a _click._  
_  
_  
"Oh!"she gasped," Thanks, Uryuu! Actually, seeing as your a doctor and all, would you mind helping me register with this hospital while I'm here? The doctor I had over in London insisted I still go to my scheduled check-ups so..."

Uryuu looked at her, confusion dancing across his sharp features.

"Orihime, why would you need to re-register? Is there something wrong?"

Her eyes widened slightly, and she bit her lip. So he hadn't figured it out? She had assumed that was what he had meant when he said that he was happy for her. Oh dear, she had been quite pleased with his calm reaction too.

"Well, actually I'm kind of..." He nodded, encouraging her to continue. Her grey eyes shifted to the side as she gripped the soft material of her jumper. Perhaps she should keep quiet about the baby? After all, Ulquiorra should have a say in this too, right? He was the baby's father and...

No. This was her decision, she couldn't rely on other people to do everything for her. She inhaled shakily, and then cast her eyes towards the floor as if it deserved her utmost attention.

"...pregnant." She whispered quietly. She heard a sharp intake of breath from Uryuu's direction. Slowly, she raised her eyes to meet his, only to find them staring dead ahead, mouth agape. Once more, she bowed her head.

"I'm sorry,"She said."I thought you had figured it out..." His mouth moved slightly, as if to form words, but it promptly closed. She gulped. His face looked so serious and.._.angry. _Uryuu had_ never _been angry at her. She squeezed her eyes shut and prepared for him to shout, but it never came.

"Where is Ichigo?" He hissed, venom coating his words dangerously.

"Huh?" She asked.

"Ich-i-go. Where is he?"

"Uhmmm, I think he's with Urahara-san...?"

"Stay here." Uryuu growled, storming off with the intent to kill glittering in his eyes.

**Special thanks go to~!**

**Bleached-Whale,**

**sama-chan,**

**Andr3w R0b3rts0n,**

**Morning Bleach,**

**Lolittawork-Libretto,**

**nypsy,**

**Q u e e n V a m p.**

**BIG THANKYOU'S TO SAMA-CHAN, MY AMAZING BETA/AGE-BUDDY! Can you believe it? She called me pretty~! Uwahhh, my cheeks are still glowing~! :3**

**nypsy- I'm glad you're sticking with this story~! And she hasn't had her check-up yet, so who knows what kind of havoc Ichigo has caused down there...?**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated! I know this hasn't been the best chapter, but please spare some time and drop a review(or a flame, if you must!) **


	11. AUTHORS NOTE

**AUTHORS NOTE:**

'Ello everyone! Umm, so here's the deal. I'm real sorry that I haven't updated in SO long, I've just started my coursework and am overloaded with homework and shizzle right now, but I feel really bad about the amount of time it's been taking me to update, so I'm gonna give you guys a choice in what you want me to do, m'kay?

So, I don't know if I wanna continue this story. BUT, if you guys want me to continue, please drop a review saying 'YES' and then explain why. If not, a review saying 'NO' and why please! If your just kinda neutral, tell me and maybe you can give me some opposing views?

If I get enough readers wanting me to continue, with GOOD reasons, I will. But if the majority vote is no, I'll get the hint, delete the story and be on my merry way!

SO. Please give me your thoughts! The future of Finders Keepers depends on it!

Bye bye! ~YUKIHIMECHAAN.


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